How Screening Questions Show “Sex Addiction” Is a Scam

How Screening Questions Show “Sex Addiction” Is a Scam
Guess what? I may be a “sex addict.” I took a “Woman’s Sexual Addiction Screening Test” online and answered “yes” to enough questions “for sexual addiction to be an area of concern.” The site urged me “to attend a 12-step support program and consider a consultation with a counselor.” I took another site’s test and scored even worse. That site told me I had a clear problem with my sexual behavior and should definitely seek treatment. That’s weird. I have never felt more confident or sexually and emotionally healthy than I do at this point in my life. My putting “sex addiction” in quotes should clue you in to my opinion: “Sex addiction” and “porn addiction” are bogus concepts designed to target people who already feel guilty about perfectly normal sexual behaviors. Neither porn nor sex addiction is an official diagnosis in the DSM-5 – the guidelines used by mental health professionals to help determine course of treatment. A recent study showed the brains of so-called porn addicts don’t behave like those of other addicts. Drug addicts’ brains show a strong emotional response when viewing images of their drug of choice. That did not happen with self-identified porn addicts – in fact, brain activity associated with emotions actually decreased. The study’s lead author noted, “While we do not doubt that some people struggle with their sexual behaviors, these data show that the nature of the problem is unlikely to be addictive.” Still, numerous counselors and treatment centers – many religiously affiliated – continue to push the idea of sex addiction. One well-known example is xxxChurch. Many online sex addiction quizzes draw their questions from the Sex Addiction Screening Test developed by Dr. Patrick Carnes (known by some as a pioneer of the sex-addiction field and by others as a snake-oil salesman). Let’s look at some of the questions I answered “yes” to in the tests I took. Do you regularly go to strip clubs, sexual bathhouses, sex clubs and/or adult bookstores? Yes, my husband and I are members of a local kink/sex club. We attend events once or twice a month either as a couple or with other partners. Are you eager for events with friends or family to be over so that you can leave to have sexual adventures? Sure, sometimes. Haven’t you ever been to a tedious party or boring family dinner? Do you regularly purchase romance novels or sexually explicit magazines? Heck, yes! I have several historical romances and erotic novels on my Kindle. As for magazines, I was a fan of Penthouse Letters in the 90s. Do you often find yourself preoccupied with sexual thoughts or romantic daydreams? Of course. Don’t you? Has sex or romantic fantasies been a way for you to escape your problems? I’m starting to think you’re messing with me. Yes, of course. Sometimes I need a mental break, so I watch some porn and masturbate, or read a trashy novel. Do you find yourself having multiple sexual or romantic relationships at the same time? Yes. My husband and I are in an open relationship. Do you regularly engage in sadomasochistic behavior? I love to be flogged and have my nipples clamped. Have you stayed in romantic relationships after they become emotionally or physically abusive? I stayed for a couple of years when my first long-term relationship gradually turned emotionally abusive. Do I get any credit for eventually ending the relationship? Have you ever had sex with someone just because the situation aroused you, yet later felt shame or regret for doing so? That used to happen to me when I was younger. I felt ashamed for doing things I really enjoyed, but that my religious upbringing told me were wrong. It’s obvious what’s wrong with these questions. They identify normal, consensual sexual behaviors as problems, and they feed into the guilt many people, particularly religious people, have about their sexuality. Had I taken these tests when I was younger and struggling with religiously indoctrinated shame, I would have answered “yes” to more questions. The more a person feels their sexual desires are “wrong” or “bad,” the more the questions lead them to think they have an addiction. Some examples: Do you ever feel bad about your sexual behavior? When you have sex, do you feel depressed afterwards? Yes, I did – because I was told that normal behaviors were sinful. Several questions label any use of the Internet to watch porn, join sexy chats, or even to find a sexual partner, as problematic. Have you spent considerable time surfing porn online? Have you used the Internet to make romantic or erotic connections? Have you purchased erotic services online (porn, camming sessions). Other questions used to label someone a sex addict depend entirely on the beliefs of partners or family members. Do you hide some of your sexual behavior from others? A man who views a typical amount of porn probably hides it if he has a devout Baptist wife. Have people in your life been upset about your sexual activities online? A mother may punish her daughter if she catches her watching porn. Just about anyone could label themselves a sex addict based on these tests. I don’t deny people can have problems with their sexual behavior. But the “sex addict” label isn’t helpful or supported by science. It gives people an excuse for their behavior, while falsely leading them to believe they are doing something to address it. In the meantime, real mental-health problems such as depression or anxiety may go untreated. In my opinion, calling yourself a sex addict is barely a step above saying, “The devil made me do it.”
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